Common Sense, Courtesy. Use it.

It's refreshing to hear that we share almost identical frustrations about the students. My colleagues last year, save just a couple, really didn't feel the same way as I did; I would make comments and I receive these pitiful stares, as if to say, "Really, A? You really feel that way? You shouldn't be in this job." As opposed to what I believe to be a more realistic and planet-saving approach: "No shit, these kids (and their parents) need to be held accountable for their behavior." In the end, all the educators who baby and coddle these kids end up in the group of people I hold responsible for the yahoo idiots at your pool this afternoon. I got so tired of listening to teachers give 40 chances to turn in late work; here's a classic example from my school. My friend H, a first year teacher from the heart of Texas (military wife to boot) discovers that a kid has plagiarized his senior paper (required to graduate, mind you.) She brings it to the attention of the administration who, instead of failing him, decides to give the student another chance to write the paper himself. I am not kidding when I tell you that he plagiarized it a second time, got caught and was given a third chance to write it himself. At the end of the school year, H's husband was transferred to Virginia, but she told us she probably would have left anyway. In Texas, she told us, that boy woulda been expelled. Y'all don't know nothin' about discipline up here. And you know what? In all of that southern conservatism, I think she's totally right.

I wanted to comment too on the kids at the pool. The unfortunate thing about the students we're turning out of our schools is that their parents are only marginally (if at all) more civilized. Their role models are crap (at least in this area of meth labs and trailer parks and WalMart hell); there's this teeny-tiny part of me that wants to ask "How do they stand a chance?" but then I think for God's sake, can't they look around and see that the rest of the world is normal? I don't mean to sound politically incorrect (at best) or heartless and cold (at worst) but really, I have no patience for the infiltration of frat boys into the real world, where the rest of us (if a dwindling breed) do have filters, manners, etiquette and decorum. This is exactly what makes me feel like I'm 100 years old; that I get all twisted up when I'm stopped behind a pickup at the light and my ten-year-old asks me "What does that mean?" pointing to a bumper sticker that says "Nice people swallow." Sure, funny in private company (I'm all for inappropriate humor in my living room after the kids go to bed) but honestly? I have to have my kid asking about s**t like that??

Which brings up the topic of censoring, of course. Would I vote for a law banning offensive bumper stickers? Would the ever-popular rebel flag be included in "offensive"? (This would take a good third of the cars around here off the road.) I suppose in the spirit of the Constitution, I'd have to say no. Would I like it if people didn't feel the need to express f***ing everything to the entire world? Yeah. Common sense. Courtesy. Use it.

So don't think that even though I laughed my ass off about the rug-muncher thing in the end, that I wasn't even more pissed off once I understood it. In fact, both boys were suspended for three days, so the admin did their part. But did I get an apology from either kid? Did either Jason or Cody's parents insist on an apology letter, did any of them personally call me, did either one of those boys get grounded for a full school year, as would have all happened in my house? Not to mention a good ass beating? Nope. Nothing. Their fathers probably thought it was funny, their mothers probably figured I was a b***ch and deserved it. I did rally up the teachers in the name of hate crimes, but that school is full of hate- so much racism and redneckedness (good one, eh?) I couldn't stand it. It felt like such a losing battle, particularly when the kids are being bred to hate at home.

That's part of why I decided to just work on my little corner of the world - my own personal teenager. And believe me, that's about killing me as it is. Tonight he's battling with J, so I'm a little off the hook; it's better and worse than battling with him myself. My blood pressure doesn't go up as much, but the tension in the house is unbearable. I won't get into it right now, but these next three years are going to put me to the test, I tell ya. I'm going to need much more therapy, in whatever form it presents itself - hopefully I will find a comfortable balance between counseling, friends, effective meds and wine. (Yeah, I know the "effective" part of meds depends on the wine - I'm working on it.)

For now, I'm going to sign off... thanks for being up tonight and responding. Sorry you're missing W so much - only 6 days to go, if you count Friday, which doesn't really count. I'll only be around tomorrow until noon my time, then we're heading off to the big city for our "date". So if I don't catch up with you on the phone, let's plan for one night during the week?
Love and good wishes for a wonderful last day of summer tomorrow,
A