A couple of things first: A) I'm sorry I said you had had a good weekend when, clearly, the whole thing with M did not constitute "good" in any way, shape, or form. What I was thinking was that you had ended the last entry with thoughts about S and they were so positive that it overshadowed the rest of the crappy weekend. I just wanted the overnight with her to be the whole weekend. B) "Brief debriefing" isnt' redundant; a debriefing is an interrogation to determine important information; it doesn't have any time specifications, so it could be brief or lengthy. I just had to tell you that since I'm always the one getting busted on grammar and language.
To get caught up...I left off with going to the party Saturday night. It was nice, very low key, not a lot of people. We hardly knew anyone, but had a good time anyway. We only stayed until 9:30 then were too tired to bother going out for a drink, so we ended up coming home and were in bed by ten. It was all good - J has been so tired and his mind's still going a mile a minute. Sunday he kind of crashed again; I think he woke up with the thought "this is my last weekend day" looming in his brain to the point that it got in the way of one last day of relaxation. He ended up going out for a drive on his own in the afternoon and I went and got a haircut. I didn't mean to get it all cut off the way I did, but the girl messed it up so badly that I had her just hack the rest of it off. I went to some place I'd never been in desperation (hated my hair so much I cut my own bangs and was this close to cutting the whole thing myself). In the end it's not a bad cut, it's just like it's been forever, but I was trying to grow it out and now I pretty much have to start all over again.
Anyway, last night we went and had a drink with R&K before dinner, came home and ate, then J paid bills while I lounged on the couch reading Mrs. Kimball. I was so excited to find it at Costco the other day ($8.99!!) and didn't really think I'd get around to starting it just yet. Well, I read 100 pages before bed last night, so clearly it was an excellent recommendation. I can't wait to get some more reading time in, maybe tonight. I am not quite on the same reading jag as you are; I have only read one book so far this summer. Which, I may add, is good since it's one more than I read all year. I am re-joining my old book club this fall, which I'm excited about. My friend B, (whose dad died last week) is kind of our facilitator, if we have one at all. Most of our club members were at the funeral and when she told them I was coming back they were all so happy; it felt good to have been missed. Surely I have them all duped, since the prevailing "welcome back" sentiment was "we'll understand the books again finally!". As if I'm some sort of genius, ever since I interpreted the love making scene in The Lovely Bones as a moment of redemption and salvation for Susie, instead of the inappropriate sexual encounter of a 13 year old, which the rest of them saw it as. Oooooh...I'm such a renegade. :) At any rate, I'm psyched to go back, if just for the girls' night out once a month. And speaking of books, what are the 7 you have read this summer? Send me the list - I don't have a job anymore.
A job...yes. That's an interesting topic right now. Should I get a job now that J's has changed so much? Can we afford for me to stay home now? Wouldn't that be awesome! Of course that's all discussion material for after the funeral and all of this dies down a bit; not to mention I should wait and see if they make J's position permanent. The death has become a bit less all-consuming around here, but J's still struggling with the multitude of things to think about, things to do, things to do right, things to do politically correctly, things to feel. He's much better than last week (as I think most of the staff is) but the services are Thursday and that's still a big hurdle. There is such ceremony and tradition in that; it'll mostly just be a huge cry fest. What with the bagpipes and the Honor Guard and the flag-draped casket and the hundreds of Class A uniforms, I can't imagine a dry eye from start to finish. Certainly not mine, anyway. Some of the people went up north to attend the funeral of another firefighter from here who died in a different fire the day before Chief; he was only 18 and had just been fighting wildfires as a summer job after high school. No less tragic than Chief, so we sent delegates up there to honor him. The thing that got me? Chief's wife went. In all of her own personal grief, she drove up there to honor someone else. This brotherhood that I say I don't get is starting to make more sense to me as the days go by and I watch how it all works, how it all comes together. It's impressive and awe-inspiring; I suddenly realize how fortunate I am to be a part of such a unique and honorable world.
Today I ran around doing various things to get ready for the service (JJ got a haircut, had to go to the mall to make sure the boys both had all the pieces to a suit, etc.) I met up with K later in the afternoon to try the new Starbucks Vivanno - it's finally sunny here so we sat outside and jawjacked for an hour or so. I had just dropped M off to meet his new girl-who's-not-a-girlfriend, but who very well may be by the end of the day. He met her at the street fair on Saturday and hasn't gotten off the phone with her since. She's quite an interesting girl - lots of facial piercings - but I'm not judging...my son has bright blue hair. If nothing else, they look right for each other. Mom works at a car dealer by the mall, so when I dropped him off there, I met her and she was perfectly normal. Ok, so now I'll judge. What is she thinking, letting her kid poke holes all over her face at 15? I'm sorry, it's just not happening here. I don't care what color your hair is, or what color your nails are, or what kind of clothes you wear (as long as they cover important body parts) but nothing permanent. No holes, no ink. Period. $50 says he comes back this evening with a well-constructed argument about how D has piercings, and her mom let her and blah, blah, blah. I should probably start working on my rebuttal before he gets here. I hate this argument more than most of the others we have. Anyway, they're spending the day over at her friend's house and Mom seemed to be pretty in touch (holes aside) so I felt ok about leaving him there. Plus all the guys in the car dealership knew her (D) so I figured Mom had worked there awhile and my kid would be safe. He has a phone, right? What could go wrong? What if he comes back with the piercings? That part where I told him he'd have to take them out if he did it without permission is going to suck; how will I actually make him take them out? God I hate being the mother of a teenager. Valium should be government-subsidised for four years for all parents.
Other than than, nothing much going on here. I'm moving slowly today - it's hotter than heck (it's probably about 80, listen to us northwesterners b&m!) I have nothing of significance to write about; just praying for this week to go well, everyone holds it together through Thursday, and we tackle life anew on Friday. At least I'm starting off right on Friday, Chief R's wife, T, invited me to go have a massage when it's all over. Perfect. Of course, J's probably the one who needs it, but I'll think about him while I'm in there. :)
Jealous of your sun time, as usual...hoping you finished your book today. Looking forward to hearing from you and promising to write more often,
Love you, A
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