Chai tea and underwires

Hey, A,

I had a great day yesterday! I could tell it meant a lot to S that I came to see her cheer at the game and I'm glad I did. I really enjoy Sundays with my sister L and her family, probably because I don't feel like a guest, but an extension of her family. I brought down the pizza I made on Saturday as an appetizer/snack for after the pee wee game. Eventually, after the Patriots game, we had dinner. L and J had marinated a London Broil; while J was grilling it, I made a side dish--spinach with a couple leftover bacon slices, olive oil, salt and pepper (simple but delicious). L started some baked potatoes in the microwave and J finished them on the grill. For wine, J brought up a zinfandel (red, my dear, as if I have to clarify. Friends don't let friends drink white zinfandel.) Later on we had brownie sundaes for dessert. I didn't get home until after 10, late for a school night, but it was worth it. I went right to bed and fell right asleep.

I don't know how to explain it, but I feel like I shifted gears somehow over the weekend. Like--finally--after 3 weeks back at school I am in the groove and okay with it. I don't think the delayed start/shift was entirely due to mental reluctance (although clearly it was part). Part was financial too. I got my second paycheck and could finally stock my shelves again with pasta and tuna. I have shrimp in my freezer and all my scripts are filled. I don't have to worry about stretching a tank of gas...well, kind of, given the price, but at least now I can fill it again next time it's empty. I can make lists of things to do and cross them off. I luxuriate in summer, but ultimately I think I function better when I have things to do and lists that mean something. Buy 30 SPF lotion and travel pack wipes for beach bag, has its appeal in summer, but I'm okay with the ones I've been working through lately. And I'm getting comfortable with the idea of putting get back to novel on my on-going list.

My friend C rang the final get writing bell today. Or at least today I heard it as such. A little background about C and me...We are often equally miserable and disenchanted so we email back and forth all day. Every period we are required to send attendance via email, so while we're on line, we'll keep each other entertained. It is clearly part of maintaining our sanity. Sometimes all we do is forward a wanker email from a colleague with no comment. Which makes us laugh. Other times we throw ideas out to each other for a business that will save us from spending the rest of our lives teaching. Sometimes it's just about food. In fact, we bring each other leftover lunches on occasion. Today I brought her some of my Italian sausage soup with a piece of baguette. (Getting ready to land the plane here, A...) I put a peanut butter cup in for dessert because I wasn't sure if she liked lemon poppy bread or ginger snaps, the other two options from my kitchen. As it ends up she likes both. I replied, "good to know. I love ginger snaps with tea. It's like making chai in my mouth. " She wrote back "That is book worthy." That was the first time this school year, but the umpteenth time since we became close that she has responded with an lol and a that is book worthy. Today I wrote it down, right after I cussed myself out for not writing the dozens of other one-liners to which she responded the same way--last year especially. I was mad at myself the rest of the day as I racked my brain to remember others. The only one I could come up with was when I wrote "my underwire is going to puncture my lung." But at least today I wrote down the chai comment. I created a new section in my planner to record such things.

Perhaps that is the other part of the shift. I am moving forward with the school year but this year as I do, I do also as a writer...knowing that I am willing to do my best as a teacher but interested in leaving time and room to be a writer, a faithful correspondent here, a good aunt. I'm ready for more balance, and know that it is time to get back to my chakra balancing meditation. Unlike the pithy one liners that make C laugh, I actually remember it...

Good hearing from you. Take it easy. Love, Barb