I get it

Good morning, A.

I left you a message last night to tell you I was thinking about you, and to let you know that I would be around--sans W-- this weekend. He had an interview at 2:30 yesterday so that cut into his coming down yesterday, which at first I was glad about. As I wrote about, I think, I didn't want to run around Thursday and be stressed about his arrival so we decided to do just Saturday to Sunday. Then I realized even that wasn't hugely appealing to me. For two weekends in a row I have spent an overnight away, and the one before that was Boston. Suddenly it occurred to me that I haven't spent a whole weekend at home in a long time, and as much as I'd like to have W here with me, that would entail some work, and I have a lot of catching up to do. My day home earlier this week didn't make a dent in the projects I have to do. So we mutually agreed to wait another week and do a whole weekend together. Perfect. I'll have a whole weekend to myself and a whole week to get ready for him. Not that it takes a week, it's just that last week I could think of nothing but grades and NHS. It'll be nice to have the time to think of a special touch, maybe a meal I can make for us, e.g., and have time to make it happen. Plus we haven't hung out with my boys from school in a while and next weekend starts March madness, so we know next Saturday we can find them all at the local sports bar, and join them for a couple of beers there. Wow. That was a whole lot of explaining I didn't need to do. Especially since I should have started with you.

Even with the drinks in you, what you wrote was eloquent. I remember a while ago you wrote about being a mom and what that feels like and reading your post reminded me of that other eloquent post. I thought, She lost a part of herself. It's like she lost her arm. The other one works fine, her legs are there, but she's still missing an arm. And it's hard to go 2 minutes without thinking about it. I'm so sorry, Amanda.

Call if you feel like talking.

Love you,
Barb