Fun Amid Familial Insanity

Dear Barb,

I've decided I need to write an anonymous blog, where I can vent about my insane family without any of them reading it. A place where I can rant and rave and work out all my aggression and frustration without dumping it all here, or wasting good therapy money on them. I'm seriously going to lose my mind if my brother's drama doesn't end - or at least take a turn for anything more productive/positive/healthy - very soon.

Intellectually, I know that his problems are not mine, and I can't fix them. I know that I am wasting precious energy and time getting angry, or dropping my jaw in disbelief at either a) how crazy she is or 2) how stupid he is to not see it.  I'm at the point where I'm actually afraid for him - maybe not physically, but I think she could disappear with those kids, and he's too flippin' stupid to see that so he won't get an attorney. She's making suicide threats (Really? Here, you can borrow my steak knife.) and threats to "destroy" him and his new job (he just got a GREAT new job) - I mean, she's just plain freakin' nuts.

Anyway, I keep allowing him to drag me into it (because I think I want to help him) but  I end up twisted up with anger every time we talk. I just can't seem to extract myself the way I'd like to, partly because I really am afraid of what she's capable of, and I'm kind of protective of him. (ya think?) Now she's reading all his texts and emails and going through his shit and throwing tantrums every time he talks to anyone...and he just keeps telling me she's a good person. Good Lord.

So I'm thinking I might create a rant blog about in-laws. I already have two people who want to do a guest post; in-laws seem to be a hot button. :)

This weekend has been good otherwise. I had dinner Friday night with CK across the street. JK cooked the entire meal and it was awesome! Oh! Except I offered to bring the salad and I made your Greek salad.  It was a huge hit :) Thanks!  I got home fairly early and spent an hour and a half on the phone with KN (Bro's not-really-girlfriend) since we couldn't seem to coordinate a call any other time. We had a great conversation beyond BroJ about getting together in the spring with other girlfriends from highschool, then got to reminiscing about Princess Diana's wedding in light of Prince William's upcoming marriage. Mostly, it was nice not to talk only about my supremely dysfunctional brother. We can't decide where we're going on our trip, but I am so looking forward to a long weekend away with the three of them. I feel so fortunate to have maintained those friendships over so many years.

Saturday was really pretty great. I woke up late, to a text from S&T saying they were making scones and would I like to come for coffee? So I walked over there in my pjs and we sat around jaw-jacking for a couple of hours before S got a wild hair to go to the Saturday market. The two of us headed down there and left the kids with T (I love that guy).  We bought several plants and some breads and rolls from the bakery, then wandered around looking at all the crafts and things. We haven't been yet this year, so it was really nice. Later in the afternoon it started to rain, so I bagged planting the plants and curled up on the couch to watch "Up In The Air" with George Clooney. It totally ruined my mood so I took a long, hot bath and listened to classical music until it was time to get ready for dinner :)

S, T and I were invited over to K&R's for dinner - crab, salmon and ribs, no, I wasn't stuffed - because K's niece was staying with them for the weekend (the one whose mom just died). It was very fun and we had a great time getting to know her niece. Played a little Wii and got home before ten.

Today I took JJ to see the Blue Angels and that was awesome, as always. We haven't been in a few years, so he didn't really remember much of it. It was like I was taking him for the first time and I got a big kick out of how much he loved it. He's got TA and my nephew AJ over now, and the three of them all have model fighter jets; JJ of course, has his new Blue Angel. I keep hearing their voices "Control Tower, this is Blue Angel Number 4, do you copy?" ... "Roger, Blue Angel, ready for takeoff." and I'm sitting here with a big smile on my face. 

I'm going to try my hand at Pad Thai tonight, just from a packet mix, but it's a start. M's bf, IL, is in cooking school and will teach me how to do the real thing from scratch, but I had a craving so I thought I'd try this for now.

Tomorrow I'm meeting my old college friend AH (you remember her from my wedding - husband turned out gay...?) for lunch and shopping, then not much on the books for the rest of the week. I'm starting my second round of HCG tomorrow with my friend JR, so I'll try to keep the socializing to a minimum to aid my success.

Hope you've had a good week and an even better weekend.

Love you,
A